error in communication//

because even though that phone call lasted thirty minutes shorter that I wanted, my heartbeat is still at an unsafe tempo.

because I didn't say what I wanted to yesterday and I'm still mad at myself, and that phone call was my second chance but I didn't take it.

and yes, I've been a John Mayer fan, or more like a disciple since I can remember, but I still didn't take his advice no matter how many times I've listened to that damn song.

because of the way you dumbfounded me when you told me you didn't want to talk about it anymore.

because of the way you asked me then next day if we could.

because of the way you claim you're so mature, but I feel like you're the one that needs the lesson on how to be an adult.

because my teenage angst overpowers my well practiced maturity.

because I've never had to deal with someone like you before, and that drives me crazy. 

because you know how to piss me off.

and you're good at it too.

because that does piss me off.

because my heart stops,

and my breath quickens,

and my hands shake every time my phone goes off.

because my heart sinks when I see it isn't you.

because I'm writing this post about you when I told myself I wouldn't.